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Adult seeking hot sex Warthen Georgia Everyday w4m I hate this time of year. Everything is blown out of proportion and I dread it every year. Part of me continuously hears that holidays are for family, I don't know where I fit in. Where is Winterville ME hot wife family? Is my family the ex-husband kids and grandkids?

My parents and sibling? My boyfriend?

How is a person to know? For me the angst starts around halloween, a couple weeks before, then it doesn't end until after the new year.

Around Halloween I like to take the kids to haunted houses, I like to go out trick or treating and watch the little ones run around Winterville ME hot wife comes the downward slide where I feel I have to "save the day" by getting everyone just the right thing so no one gets dissappointed, I dread it every year I get Hot women wants hot sex Minot North Dakota, I Winterville ME hot wife needy, I get weird for lack of a better term I constantly feel like a square peg in a round world.

I get tired of the everyday, but part of me craves the monotony. Witnerville crave Winterville ME hot wife schedule but don't at the same time. You say I don't share, I don't put myself out there. There is a reason behind that I have been hurt too many times in the past, I have learned that the less people know about me the less they have to work hog when it comes time to back-stab me or break up or just get mad.

I have told you before I suck up negativity like a sponge, and it takes me forever to get over it. People Contacts for singles in Ennis Montana complained in the past that I always remember the bad things, not the good ones, I have tried to change that, but it evades me.

I probably don't have the right social uot ingrained in Winterville ME hot wife to identify with the majority of the population. I didn't have many friends in school, and none that carried on to my adult life.

Most of my school days I spent off time hiding in the library or kitchen at the Wihterville, either writing information down out of encyclopias Hoh helping the lunch ladies with the dishes Simply because I didn't want to be ridiculed by my peers.

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Which by the way was a daily occurence. There is a reason I am the way I am.

No one seems to understand that, partially because I think they don't want to and partially because I won't let them. I try to keep Winterville ME hot wife barrier, so I don't get hurt, I always do, so its not much help I try to think of the other person and put their feeling first, which is why I don't like to yell or argue.

I take the blame on a lot of Winterville ME hot wife. I am tough enough to handle a lot of things. You said I am selfish, I never have grasped the concept of those words It seems everyone always has to read into things, find the hidden meaning or make things into something they are Housewives looking real sex Columbus Ohio 43206. I usually just say things outright.

You say I play victim, maybe thats how it comes across, but maybe your reading into things again.

Maybe the words I say are what I actually mean and feel. Thats why there is so much I don't understand about the way people work. When I say I want to Wintsrville up in a ball and Winterville ME hot wife, I actually mean it, most don't.

Most people I think want someone to feel sorry for them, tell them its going to be okay I actually literally want to run away, go somewhere and just Winterville ME hot wife. I do not cry out for sympathy.

I want to be selfish sometimes, just forget other people exist, just worry about myself I can't do it I have tried The only way I can shut eife my feeling completely and it only lasts for awhile is to get raging drunk to where I just don't care.

Then it always comes back and gets me two fold for days and weeks and months on end. I beat myself up over being mean and ous. I Winteville Winterville ME hot wife I am such a confusing person to deal with. It's confusing for me as well. I want to love, I want to be loved, I want the security wite having a person that will always be there for me.

I just don't know how to modify myself Winterville ME hot wife make it fit.

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I probably have severe mental issues and probably need years of counseling. I more than likely have things about my past that haunt me that have never been resolved.

I probably don't know myself which causes me to not identify with others on a level Winterville ME hot wife is understandable.

I don't know I don't know what it is you want to know I will share, I will let you in It takes time, it takes questions, it takes understanding When told that I leave.

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